Here in Tonga “it takes a village” seems to be more true than almost anywhere else I have seen. There is such a strong sense of community and family. I often have a hard time figuring out who lives where because ‘family’ becomes a loose term. This is comfortable for me because it is a lot like my family. We always had ‘extras’ whether a boy/girlfriend, someone who works for dad or a friend who needs a place to stay. These folks always become part of the family being invited to parties and having chores. Same in Tonga!

The attitude is almost a pay it forward attitude, but everyone has a job and everyone helps everyone so there is not a time frame to associate pay forward or backs. Generally you just give what you have and what you can, knowing that others will do the same for you, and they do.

It amazes me that everyone has a job, which is usually based on your age and gender. Example children are errand runners and will run to the falekaloa (convenience store) for their family. Remember that family extends to almost anyone you know so seeing Viliami at the store doesn’t mean that he is there for Palu, his mother. He could have been walking by Amalia’s house and she sent him. So it is not uncommon to go to the store and find 3 kids eagerly awaiting their turn too. Once Sione, my town officer asked why I came to his falekaloa? To buy a phone card and butter, I said. Yes but why did you walk yourself, send a child! Duh Alice.

Some other jobs include making tea (young women or girls), harvesting crops in the bush (men and boys if they don’t have school), building/repair (men), making kahoas (flower or candy necklaces) (women and girls), making umu (food baked in an underground oven) for a feast (men and boys), cooking food for a feast (women and girls). These are just a few examples and of course they are maliable. If a family doesn’t have a member that is the right age or gender, obviously someone else has to do the job. Women can help harvest crops in the bush and men can cook and do dishes, but the opposite is the norm.

Friends and neighbors can help fill the gaps also. If you don’t have a young child who can go the falekaloa, call a neighbors kid! (I use this one when I am sick and it is a life saver). When I needed a fence I asked my neighbor where to buy the fencing and she said find some youth, ask Fetu’u and Samu. So I did and later (3 weeks, but that’s another entry) they came with the fence, posts, nails and tools all gathered and donated by neighbors. Wow thanks!